A senior politician once told me something, I’ll never forget, “Doctors never speak well of other doctors.” I laughed then. I don’t anymore. Because over the years, I’ve realized — he was right. In medicine, colleagues are rarely friends.
They’re co-surgeons, co-authors, co-panelists — but seldom companions. We attend the same conferences, exchange polite smiles, even click photos together. But the moment one name appears in the newspaper or a patient praises one doctor more than another, invisible walls rise.
You can feel it — that subtle withdrawal, the sudden silence in the WhatsApp group, the carefully disguised sarcasm that says, “He’s/She’s lucky,” instead of “He’s/She’s good.”
Why does this happen?
Medicine, unlike most professions, was built on rank and hierarchy. From the day we enter medical school, we’re told that success is relative. Life is a zero-sum game! Only the “toppers” get surgery. Only the “best” get post- graduation. A handful only “make it big.” So we start running — not to be better doctors, but to be better than other doctors.It’s not malice. It’s conditioning.
No one teaches collaboration. We are taught to compete. Research actually backs this. Studies from the British Medical Journal and Psychology of Health Professionals show that doctors report the highest rates of professional isolation compared to engineers, lawyers, or corporate professionals.
One study found that over 60% of physicians have no close professional friends outside their immediate workplace. That isolation is silent but it’s lethal Because when doctors stop trusting each other, they stop learning from each other.
When envy replaces empathy, the whole ecosystem suffers. And everyone loses — especially the patients. The truth is — most doctors are emotionally alone.
When our collegue is getting screwed infront of us , we silently watch with pity or silent happiness and not with empathy ,without realizing that you are the next person to be screwed up behind your arse.
Start Becoming What Was Meant To be
And the worst part? We are too proud to admit it. Maybe it’s time we redefined what it means to be a “successful doctor.” Not just someone with the longest waiting list. but someone who can genuinely celebrate another doctor’s success.
Not just someone who saves patients, but someone who can save colleagues from cynicism. When doctors start standing up for each other instead of standing apart,we will finally heal the one disease that’s plagued our profession the longest – insecurity
And perhaps then, medicine will stop being a lonely battlefield, and start becoming what it was meant to be.
(Dr Naresh Purohit is Advisor- National Mental Health Programme. The views expressed are that of the author)